Disappointed

Went to the X'mas party at fringe office today. Just feel wiered 'cause I had a feeling that I don't fit there and they don't look high on me. Maybe it's me look too high on this situation. But I felt I lost something because of myself. I felt the bridge 8 isn't satisfied if I am the one Vivien recommends.

At first, Flora talked to me. When I said something of job, future, she said you should ask Vivien...I don't know. Bad feeling. Then, I talked to Vivien for a while, at last, she showed me the leaflet of some programs of Fringe Shanghai presenting to HK Fringe. Oh my god, I'm not that idle, mam!!

Heard from Afra that Vivien didn't find sposnorship for the pop concert successfully. Clearing my mind, I did know her well already. I should never take her words seriously.

Another situation is that the company which my uncle recommends to me is in a cold situation as the legal man of the investment party did something breaking the law. Though the company is run by a business consulting ltd., it's still unclear to me. No one wants to work for a company linking to candals. It's more impossible to apply after knowing this kind of thing.

So where is my position?
I don't want to be that one works tiredly just little amount of money hardly covering the living expense and under others prestige. Even I know there is no money I can earn.

I don't regret the choice made in 2006 but it seems now that comparing to friends my choice is poor enough ----no pay, hard work. Shit!!!!!

啃老的生活

最近的生活很羞耻。因为在啃老。
每天睡到11点，下午看澡堂或是三顺，当作背景音乐。
看了部很棒的片子，《谍影重重3》。虽然是续拍片，但是却非常吸引我，一改我对续拍片的坏印象，并且一举把它列为我最钟爱的片子第一位。之后又看了他的前两部，都极具水准。看得我很爽，很久没有看到这么精彩的片子。还激起我去电影院再看大屏幕的冲动。真的很难得！
马特戴蒙也成为我非常喜欢的男星之一。我已经很久没有喜欢过这么阳光的人了，虽然他在电影中的角色还是受人同情。
我知道，我又开始疯狂的迷恋了。迷恋马特戴蒙饰演的杰森伯恩这样的男人，出色的特工兼具专情男人的品质。这三部电影我已经反复看了不下10遍了吧。
我就是那么容易沉溺于优秀男人的光环之中。自己都受不了自己。

Finally, I don't know where to go

I failed. I didn't get the expected result of IELTS test which means that although I still reach the requirement of UAL but still half point off to many other excellent graduate schools of arts administration like City, Goldsmiths, Warwick.

Just now, after I finally decided to take the burden to UK, I happened to know that Shanghai representative office has been retracted. So incredibly that I even got the email from the head two days ago. Am I ridiculed?

最近好像一直在做“挖空”的事。真不知道怎么回事。It may be a good thing that I can settled down to what I should have done as any graduate that finding a job and live a ordinary life. Then, if the UK study is hard to come to true, I surely will find a job, take the IELTS again and decorate my house which is the most thing that makes me morose if I can't finish it before I study abroad.

Time is passing so fast! Can't believe I am the guy that directly unemployed after graduation. I don't want to be idle anymore. Yes or no, I need a result!

I move here lo!

Wow! I like what all the products of Google. They are so cool. As long as I tried Gmail, I dumped all other email accouts. I like google earth so much. I like the schedule part of google cause it's so nicely. And now I try this blog. See what will happen. Haha......

I want to be frank here. I should say what I wish to happen in my future.
Pass IELTS at 7 of average score next Saturday on Sept. 22.
Pass GRE on Oct. 27 at 500, 800, 3.5.
What a funny thing is that I don't receive the score of last GRE test, never ever. Oops...
I want to go Bocconi University in Italy for MA of arts administration.
I wanna boyfriend, my first loved boy in the near future.
I want to be in love.
I hope everyone loves me live a healthy, happy life because of me.